i don't post much here but i've been with tweak3d since 1998 under various names. i haven't posted any cry baby women stuff but i just have to post this one. my wife left me...she wants a divorce. we've been married for almost 2 years. it's very sudden and quite a suprise to me. i thought this was the person that i was going to spend the rest of my life with. i love her deeply more than anything in the world. but she says that she doesn't love me like she used to and that she has been unhappy for a while but she just realized all this. I'm not one who just jumps into marriage. marriage is forever to me. so for this to happen, it really hurts. and she's my best friend too, which makes it all worse. and please for the love of god, nobody talk about that there are plenty of women out there for me, especially with how i'm feeling. i'm the type of person who doesn't date women to find women. i just let things work and if i find a woman, great. and nothing about watching porn or going to get drunk 'cause i don't do those things either. i'm just really hurt and doing really bad right now and all alone. so anyways, ya, just thought i'd vent that. nobody has to respond, but if you do, pleae be nice...
Terrible, not even a chance to talk it out or marriage counseling or something? Just all the sudden, and there's no chance to try and resolve it without divorce?
That's terrible. I'm really sorry to hear about it. I don't think there's a shred of advice I could give that you haven't already thought of. At least you aren't leaving the marriage with kids hanging in the balance, right?
ya she won't go through counseling because she said she just doesn't love me that way anymore and she hasn't for a while... i tried everything known to man, anything and everything to try to avoid divorce...but nothing ya we didn't have kids luckily
People usually don't fall out of love for no reason. Either you did something (which doesn't seem likely since it seems you really do care for her) or she did something. My guess is she probably met some one. I know it's painful now but if you don't get to the bottom of it now you will be tormented by it for the rest of your life. I'm sorry you have to go through such a thing...
shit man, stories like this just make me lose faith in marriage. yea, like msp said, theres gotta be something behind all this. try to find out and let us know. Eventually, she'll spill the beans on what shes been doing or how you changed to make her feel the way she does. give us a background on her, she goto college? She had alot of guy freinds? Liked to party back "in the day", or like to go out with her lady freinds?
Chances are, in these situations (and I've been through many of them) like these, something's changed, and it is more than likely both people have changed in a way as to grow apart. If you've done nothing to change then it's all about her. Two years, huh? Seems like someone has been hiding their basic nature or, at least, part of it to 'make' the relationship work out or force it to grow. It is impossible to force a relationship to grow. Either it will or it won't, black or white....the grey area will leave one or both parties unhappy, some can live that way for along time, some can't. If it's just a phase she's going through, I don't know either of your ages, then there's a chance for a future. I wouldn't get your hopes up too high though. While it's a good thing to be 'friends' before marriage, not all 'friends' should get married. I have found this true several times. Shit, I've been married five times now. In all cases, we were friends before marriage. The real deciding factor in any successfull relationship is compatibility. Once compatibility became top priority in my relationship requirements, a successful marriage happened. My wife and I have been together for over 8 years now and are still going strong. I know the pain you're feeling and it's more horrible than even getting physically hurt. The screaming hope every time the phone rings, the waiting for a car to drive up, the running of various scenarios through you head, the what-ifs, the if-onlys, the total sadness, even the anger. It all happens at the same time and comes in waves that can't be stopped. This is all survivable....no matter what the outcome is. It's a great thing that you don't plan on hiding or coping with mind altering substances. No matter what happens, you'll be a better person in the end. Stupid quotes like "that which does not kill us makes us stronger", "one day at a time", "this too shall pass", "today is the first day of the rest of your life", and "If you love something, set it free, if it comes back to you, it's your's...if it doesn't, it never was"....all of a sudden can be a lifesaver and not just stupid phrases. It's hard, I know, but grab on to anything that will enable you to endure. I'm not here to offer up sorrow for you. I just want to let you know that you'll get through whatever you need to get through and, in the end, come out a better person, more empowered to deal with life. Hang in there buddy. Just be honest with yourself, look for trueth and facts and you'll be OK.
I'm sorry to hear. I'm suprised she actually said whats on her mind. ivwshane, people can fall out of love, without having to do something to make it happen. Hope you feel better, and take it easy, man.
I feel for you... and as I understand, it's with her you would want to stay. It may not seems real now, but maybe that.. in the long run, it's better that way. But for now, I suggest to talk with her, figure things out, know what exactly happen.. it will surely help to know And btw, you said you posted on various names.. what were they?
that is one reason why I really do not want to get marrier. I agree with a few other posters. There has to be a reason why? No? I mean people do sometimes fall out of love, but there has to be a reason to it. Well good luck, hopefully shes a cool chick and wont gauge you for the house and a lot of money.
I'm sorry to hear that happened, but while it may hurt you now, it is always better than being in a relationship where both people are not totally committed. Hang in there, talk to her and find out exactly what was/is going on, because that is the only way (in my opinion) to get through this and not come out wondering what happened.
She's either the world's biggest flake or there's something going on. Either way it doesn't sound like it matters much. It would appear she's made up her mind and is leaving. My heart goes out to you dude. I was with a girl for nearly three years and she basically said the same thing to me - I don't love you anymore. And I know you said you didn't want to hear this, but a few years later I met my wife and she's 10x my woman my ex-girlfriend was. There's a better girl for you out there.
Sorry to hear about this. I'm going through a similar thing right now, except the roles are reversed. It is possible for two people to grow apart. My wife and I are trying counseling. If you can get her to go it might help. A marriage isn't something you just throw away.
I don't have any pearls either but I went through the same thing although I got dumped a few months before the wedding. She said the exact same thing as in your story...her excuse turned out to be some guy giving her oodles of attention at work. She came back a yr and half later and dumped me again...oh well. It's given me my view on women (which isn't kind). Just hang in there, it won't get better unless anytime soon so try to keep yourself busy. I drank a lot and played video games - seemed to help but I'm now a pessimistic bastard
thanks for the thoughts guys.... as for the different names i've been under...oh geez...um I've been under Josh, Stryfe, Thanatos, The Dark Angel, Red Flame...and now Chainblade. I'm sure i'm forgetting some of the others. I can never stick with the same name! Probably most of you wouldn't even know any of these names. I've never been a big poster. But I've been here since 1998 so i'm one of the oldest living members i would assume
