This is a special day, relegated to the three Fs of life: Food, Football, and Family Fights. ... Maybe that's FOUR Fs... anyway, I cheated this year, and just bought takeout turkey dinner (with free pumpkin pie slice), and made my own cranberry relish, by slopping together cans of whole cranberry sauce, crushed pinapple, and unsweetened apple sauce, then adding crushed (by me) walnut halves, and a dollup of orange juice.
It's weird that it's associated with Football when they make you watch the fucking Cowboys and the Lions every year. I don't even care if they're good, fuck both of those teams.
At first, nothing, but after the fifth straight day of trying to finish off my frankensteinian creation, I'm thinking about firebombing all cranberry bogs in a fit of berry-terrorism...
It took me this long to finally finish the last of that, then finish the leftover applesauce. And we just got a fruit basket sent to us. More apples. Sigh... I also learned that opening a can of crushed pineapple, then storing the can in the fridge with a cover, is a bad idea. This is the first time I've seen fruit reacting with the metal of a can like that.
Isn't that one of those "things I learned in kindergarten" things? Say please and thank you. Don't talk to strangers. Don't grab 'em by the pussy. Don't store food in the can.
